Today I’ve reached my limit.
Nothing in particular has pushed me over the edge. I think just the daily struggle and repetitive routine has ground me down. I just made a trip to Tesco. Not to get anything in particular, just to get out of the house. I picked up some instant latte sachets and some Quorn fillets because they were on offer. I went to the self service checkout, paid and left. I got home, ready to settle down with a coffee. Only, I’d forgotten to put the shopping in the bag.
How did this happen? How did I get to the stage where I buy stuff and forget to pack it? I pride myself on having *most* of my wits about me, I function and most days I think I’m doing alright. But today, my brain feels like a fuzzy mess. I think it’s time to admit defeat. I’m glad it’s happened when Gareth has a week off work coming up because I’m not sure I can manage doing it all alone anymore.
I’ll be fine, I know I will. I think I just have to recognise the signs of me burning out and do something about it before it gets to this stage. Self care is so important and as parents, we need to remember that we’re still people. I’m not just a mother. I’m Shannon. I like reading, drinking coffee, glittery things, unicorns, writing, quirky things…the list is endless of things that make me me. A car can’t drive on fumes, eventually it’d conk out and wouldn’t drive until more fuel was put it. So why do I think I can run on fumes? I can’t give my all to my family if I’m not all there myself.